September 19, 2022 – Week 7, Day 1

Warm Up Circuit

Axle Push Presses 
26x2
56x2
86x2
116x2
146x2
176x2
206x1
206x1
206x1
206x1
206x1
206x1
206x1
206x1

Close Grip Bench Presses
45x10
95x5
135x5
185x3
225x3
275x1
315x2
275x3
275x3
275x3

Comments: This was not a good workout. I should preface this with saying that I thought I had gotten over the bad one on Thursday last week but nope. I needed more rest. Just doing too much. I stopped the workout once I felt there was no point to it or anything really and ate dinner and went to bed. Still in a funk the following day and didn’t feel like doing anything or any kind of training. Ate maybe half my normal meals. Didn’t feel like going to Nationals anymore and just giving up. That’s how frustrated I was. I ended up sleeping for 1.5hrs after work that day and made myself get up to eat dinner. It also appears that my phone wasn’t working correctly Monday or Tuesday and stuff started going through Wednesday morning. But I feel back in the saddle and that I’ve had time to process things. Mention this because the proceeding stuff is the thoughts in the moment. So on with it. So feeling some aches in my upper body joints and the workload had been lessened a good bit for this workout. I did one set (rather than two) of wall slides and y raises with bands but did 2 second holds. This had been mentioned in my training to eventually reduce the warming up as we got closer. Seeing as how tough the last overhead workout was, this was the time. So the plan for the start here was axle push pressing with 65% for singles done EMOM style. No bands. Not as tough, recovery being allowed. I didn’t feel like wearing any support gear beyond wrist wraps with the light weight. I planned to do doubles working up in 30lbs jumps and then do the 8 singles. Weights were feeling heavy, 90lbs away from goal weight. I think hope was this was light enough that it wouldn’t be an issue and that I seem to get better as I do sets on speed work. Form didn’t seem to be great here. Felt like I was pushing out in front too much. I think bad habit of that with the band pressing and trying to have it be a solid press. Could also be from fatigue in the upper back and neck from all the pulls and farmer’s walk stuff. Pressing out in front has been a problem. It was a problem on the log at PA Dutch and it was an issue on axle at Battle at the Bridge. I was feeling very annoyed that these weren’t feeling great and that this was weight that I had been strict pressing comfortably earlier this year. Just kept putting in the time. Telling myself this was one of those put in work days to get back on track. Last rep was the only rep I was somewhat ok with. From there it was on to benching. Close grip stuff but not pauses or tempo. Goal was to do 305-315lbs for 3x3 with 2-3RIR. Depending on how I felt, I was going to pick either 305lbs or 315lbs to do. Things were feeling fine warming up. Similar to how they had felt when doing axle last week. So I had felt like 315lbs was fine. It was not. Just felt heavy today. I thought perhaps I could grind out these reps as I’ve been able to do that in the past. Nope. Got a double and the third rep stalled halfway and had to bring it down to the safety pins and bail. I was just not understanding this. My triceps have been feeling strong even if my shoulders had not. I’ve done this weight for a set of 9 reps in the past. Never really pushing the weights as of late but didn’t think I’d be getting less than 5 reps on them even now. Seeing as how that went. I was really fuming over this. My inability to be as strong as I should. I knew I couldn’t do 315lbs for the working sets today or even 305lbs. I had to lower the weight to 275lbs to get through these. First set was fine as it could be while I was holding back my frustration and each set got tougher, even with longer rests. Last set I misgrooved the second lift. I was very much done with the day but I had to sit and think what I was doing. I had three more exercises for the shoulders and triceps that were either light or just bands. Higher rep stuff and time under tension. It was probably going to be fatiguing. And was that something I needed right now if my shoulders are so nuked that I’m struggling on submaximal stuff? I also felt what was the point really of doing the other exercises if they aren’t helping. Eventually I just decided to put stuff away and call it there. Didn’t bother stretching or icing. Ate dinner and took ibuprofen before going to sleep. I was so frustrated. Was I the problem and I’m just this mediocre that I can’t progress beyond this point? Pressing has felt like it’s regressing since May really. My feelings of lack of progress on this one lift has me feeling embarrassed and not wanting to compete right now. Or ever. What is the point of this week in and week out toiling if there is nothing to show for it beyond sweat, joint pain, and feelings of inadequacy. That I have to retreat into myself at these kind of times and realize that if I were sharing my life with someone else, it would be a stressful burden when I cloister myself in my own head to repair. Such strong surges of emotion don’t tend to last as they are exhausting and hopefully I will figure it out. But right now I’m kind of lost.